One of those things I try to instill in my children is that we all need moments of calm, quiet, and isolation. They were young when I taught them The Momma Moment. When I am overwhelmed by questions, noise, and the endless amount of household duties and I feel myself getting snappy at them, then I call for a Momma Moment.
A Momma Moment doesn’t just happen, it needs to be taught. It started with them learning that a Momma Moment means Mum is off limits during it, unless there is an actual emergency. They learn to understand that it’s a way for me to step away and breathe and have a momentary recharge so I can come back and face life and responsibilities with more calmness for myself and for them. And overtime they started to understand the importance of taking a moment alone to calm. Because if Mum needs a Momma Moment, then they’re also allowed a moment to go calm themselves too; that’s just part of being human.
One important rule of the Momma Moment is that if you interrupt mum during it, the Momma Moment has to last longer to make up for the interruption. And they’ve become pretty good with allowing me that time and space to reset in those moments. I usually laugh when I hear a kid coming towards the door and hear a sibling go, “WAIT! She’s having a Momma Moment, so leave her alone!” They’ve learned that when Mum reemerges from the time and space granted, she’s a lot less cranky, can listen and engage more with them, and generally becomes more present again.
And these moments aren’t just for me. It’s the same as when I can tell my husband needs a moment too. I close the door to our room and take on the kids, so he can have his alone time too. I tell the kids that Dad is having Dad Time, just like when I take my Momma Moment. But absolutely everyone in the house is given that opportunity of solitude to escape, regroup, and calm their body and mind. And in the process it’s creating empathy and respect for when someone needs that time and space. If you find you’re getting snappy with those around you, think about teaching the Momma Moment or something similar, so that everyone in the family understands and respects that sometimes we just need a moment for ourselves so we can come back and be present for others.
Continual Momentum 