It’s an awful state of mind you find yourself in to feel you are unlovable, unworthy of love, and undesirable. Perhaps throughout your life you’ve been told hurtful things about who you are. Perhaps as you grew up you were shamed for your appearance. Maybe you were ridiculed as your body changed, forcing you into hiding. Or maybe you compared yourself to others as if who they are was the standard you needed to achieve. Whatever led you to this moment of feeling unlovable, know that how you feel was taught and not the reality. You weren’t born hating who you are, but others have impacted how you feel about you. What you need to know is that where some undervalue you, others will truly see the amazing person you are.
You see, where we see our own flaws, the people who matter see worth. Where we see ugly, they see beauty. The negative stories we’ve been told about who we are are a reflection on the people who said them. But those who are truly connected to you will see all the good that you have to offer. There is something that will draw you into them, and you will feel a connection that is not based on negativity. It is a connection that will build you up and not tear you apart.
One of the hardest parts of learning to see yourself as whole and loveable, as you are, is the realization and deconstruction of the social constructs and the words of others that have made you feel less than the beautiful person you are. But I promise you, you are whole and complete and worthy of love that fills you up and doesn’t break you down. The foundation of that negative self has been built over the years through the words of others, and once you learn this, you can conquer and overcome it.
The problem with feeling and believing we are unloveable is that it opens up the opportunities to settle for a relationship that doesn’t lift us up. We get lost in the idea of, well this person is all I am worthy of and I should be grateful they are with me because no one else will love me as I am. But there are people out there that take advantage of those who feel broken and less than whole. You are not broken. You are loveable. You are deserving of more.
No matter what your physical self looks like, there is beauty in who you are in every moment of every day. It could be the way your eyes shine in the light; it could be the bounce of your hair as you walk; it could be the smile that stretches across your face; or, the freckles across your cheeks. There is someone out there who will look at you as if you are the most beautiful person and they will be able to tell you that and why.
When we feel unlovable, we desire to feel that love we can’t feel for ourselves, but the reality is, you need to also take the time to find what you love about yourself too. The confidence through that journey will radiate and highlight more of what makes you who you are and will bring better people into your world. You are lovable and the right person will see you for you and embrace every part of who you are as the missing piece to their own puzzle. You are lovable and deserving of feeling like you are.
Continual Momentum 